I now explain to you the election so far. You're welcome America

Dear  America, 

I can’t tell you how many people have come to me saying, Madrone, Madrone, what is going on with the crazy election this year.  What’s with all the yelling and screaming and what difference does it make anyway. Should I care?  And who do you recommend I vote for if I do decide to a. care and b. vote.
Well first, whoa, no way am I telling anyone who to vote for, that’s nuts. Why would I do that? I’m not crazy.  And I certainly am not going to tell you who I’m going to vote for, none of your beeswax, missy.

I will break it down for you, if you want, and you can do what you want with the information.

First on the Republican side-

There’s that Governor from one of those states that begins with a vowel, what’s his name.  He seems nice enough. But I can’t think of a word he’s said one way or the other, so that tells you something right there.

And there is a doctor who is quiet and black.  And he said he tried to stab his own mother once, so I don’t like that, because what kind of a person stabs their own mother.  And even if they did, who goes around bragging about it? On the other hand, that might be a good skill for a president, what do I know.

Then there are those two Spanish fellas, one is tiny and cute enough, and goes by his given name. The other one is bigger and somewhat scary looking, with a pointed nose, but I wouldn’t hold that against him you can’t help your nose, it’s a family thing, good for him. But his real name is Rafael and he goes by Ted, so I don’t like that. I mean, is he not proud of who he is? My grandfather would only vote for people whose names ended in a vowel BTW.  That’s one way to decide.

Then there is the one from the Bush family.  All I can say is that three guys from one family is a lot when you consider how many people have NO presidents in their family.  I’m just saying.

And the last one is the guy from NYC who comes from money and thinks who he is.  

On the Democratic side,

There is an old lady and an old man. The old lady looks better for her age,  The old guy, I don’t know, I hope he’s taking his pills.   Young people seem to like the old guy, because he wants to give them stuff. The old lady is like now, now, vegetables before dessert, that’s the rules, nag nag, so no wonder she’s up against it.  

SO there you are.  Take your pick. As my mother would say, , bunch of idiots. But they are our idiots.  

God Bless, Donna