Dear Madrone, My middle daughter isn't a bad person, I see that she has friends and her own children are polite, and her husband, a real gentleman, even if his family has strange ideas, and a good provider, so no complaints there, even so, when I go visit her, it's like a ton of bricks weigh on my heart. They don't live right, I'm sorry. I don't recognize anything sensible in the way that they arrange their lives...nothing from the way WE do things has remained.
I try my best to hide my dismay, but it's hard to hold my tongue when I see salad being served at the beginning of the dinner, and no pie with the coffee. And don't get me started on the way she lets my granddaughter's hair hang in front of her eyes. How can I prevent myself from saying something harsh? Biting Tongue, Los Alamos
Dear Biting, Oh you can prevent yourself from saying something harsh by keeping your mouth shut, it's that simple. What you need to ask is how you can keep yourself from thinking these things. Because your daughter can read your mind, just the way you can read hers. God bless, Donna
A note to the rest of you: You know how sometimes you think you're getting along Ok, even if some things aren't quite right, and then all of a sudden someone treats you like you don't exist and you're completely stunned, what did you do that was so terrible. The above letter is what you did.