Friends,
It’s January. Hop in de ass, as my grandfather, may he rest, used to say after a glass of two of home made muscatel. Time to remind you of the resolutions you should be keeping although you won’t, why should this year be any different?
1. Take stock of who has what you want, and how badly you want it. Kiss up accordingly.
2. Figure out who wants what you have. Decide whether or not you want to give it to them and what they have to do to get it.
Lots of times the same person ends up on list 1 AND 2. Then it depends which list they are higher on.
3. To hell with diets. Especially one that doesn’t know the difference between good bread and the crapola that most places pass off as the staff of frigging life. Please.
4. Don’t let me stop you from exercising, but don’t come crying to me when you find out you’ve jammed up your knee or given yourself a hernia.
5. Family first. Now this isn’t always possible, there are a lot of real crumbums out there and they have to be related to someone. In that case, you might be better off taking whatever heat comes from putting them second.
6. Screw guilt, and regret, too while you’re at it. In my book they are just barely above pity in the Waste of Time Hall of Fame. So you made a mistake, ok, you meant to do it, whatever, take your lumps, learn and move on. For the love of Pete spare everyone your whining about rigged juries or narcoleptic attorneys. No one wants to hear it.
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